Transitions can sometimes be hard, and to be perfectly honest, as a parent I’d been dreading the moment when our daughter would head off to college.

We share a lovely bond, and for years I had envisioned myself, as if in some dramatic movie scene, falling apart at the seams and sobbing uncontrollably as we hugged goodbye and my husband and I left to return to the “empty nest.” Even though our particular “nest” would thankfully still be occupied by our younger son for a few more years, it still seemed like a huge upheaval was bound to occur because of our daughter’s absence.

I found to my relief, however, that the anticipated scene and the actual reality were leagues apart, and in no small part because of steady, prayerful preparation. This desire to hear God’s direction and follow His wise leading brought a host of angel thoughts to guide us during our daughter’s recent move to her college halfway across the country. God’s gracious hand was at the helm during the whole process, and we saw evidence of this in instances of provision and protection as well as in the calm assurance that God would help us handle all the details.

Granted, my husband and I did get teary-eyed as we left our daughter’s dorm to catch our flight home. But by this time they were mostly tears of joy, not a sign that our hearts were breaking. I realized how absolutely happy our daughter was about this forward step. After all, she was amply prepared and ready to jump into everything good that college offers, including greater independence and self- sufficiency, higher fields of academic study, and a broader group of friends. Surely I could be happy about all of this!

During the weeks and even months leading up to her move, when tears welled up and the suggestion came that I was somehow “losing” my daughter or giving up something good in my experience (and oftentimes these thoughts came from well-meaning friends and relatives), I acknowledged specifically in my prayers that Soul, God, was expressing in me serenity, peace, and calm, and that I couldn’t be deprived of my God-given joy. As Mary Baker Eddy writes in Science and Health, “. . . joy cannot be turned into sorrow, for sorrow is not the master of joy; . . . ” (p. 304). And I claimed this for all families moving their children into college dorms.

We are all complete, satisfied ideas of God now and forever, not yearning for another—better—time or place. “Thou openest thine hand, and satisfiest the desire of every living thing,” says verse 16 from Psalm 145. Whatever supposed void our daughter’s absence might have created was already filled with God’s ever-present love, and I could trust implicitly in His plan of unfolding good for me, as well as for her.

As always, the strengthening ideas in the weekly Christian Science Bible Lessons were absolutely perfect for our family’s needs during the whole out-of-state college move, bolstering our trust in God’s care as we navigated what to us was largely uncharted territory. One Bible Lesson on “Mind” spoke very clearly to us, providing inspiration to help calm my daughter’s concerns about a big decision and transition she needed to make shortly after arriving on campus.

Our daughter decided to go through sorority “rush” (recruitment), but felt a measure of anxiety about the prospect of visiting 14 sorority houses along with almost 1,700 other prospective new members, the whole while trying to make a positive impression on each sorority so she’d be remembered and invited back. The eventual goal was receiving a bid to join one of them at the end of the week. She kept wondering: “How will I know which sorority I want to join? How can I make sure to get into the right one?” It all appeared to depend primarily on chance, luck, and good social connections.

However, I knew one of her motives in wanting to join a sorority was to give of her time and talents to community and philanthropic causes. I reminded her that when our motives are pure, and our goal is to bless, God always places us in a position where we can fully represent Him in the absolutely best way. He will use us for His glory. I also shared this helpful little saying that I have loved: “The place you need, needs you.” In other words, our best and highest qualities—our unique individuality straight from God—will always find the right home or environment in which to be expressed.

This Bible verse also seemed tailor-made for the situation: “Man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart” (I Sam. 16:7). We talked about how she didn’t need to worry about how she appeared to the girls she was meeting, or be fearful about being judged one way or another. God is the only judge and He judges righteously. Also, the Golden Text for that Lesson began, “God knows,” so I assured her that Mind, God, was doing all of the knowing, and she and everyone else were the humble reflections of that all-knowing Mind. She could rest in the knowledge that He was guiding her as well as the other girls doing the meet-and-greet “interviewing.” She had the perspicacity and wisdom and insight from Mind to know where she should be and whom she should be with.

It wasn’t surprising to us that halfway through rush week, our daughter called and excitedly told us she absolutely knew which sorority house she wanted to be in because it felt so right. It was one where the girls were refreshingly individual, genuine, and welcoming, and the house was cozy and immediately felt just like home. All the rest of that week, she kept praying with the idea of both blessing others and being blessed herself. At the end of the week, she was overjoyed to be invited to join that same sorority she’d already felt an initial connection with. (A wonderful side note was that one of her suitemates would also be joining her.)

Another Bible Lesson on “Soul” assured us that “God setteth the solitary in families” (Ps. 68:6). This certainly became true for our daughter when we gratefully realized that she did have “relatives” nearby—her many new sorority sisters. This outcome of finding just the right sorority house was another gentle reminder that our daughter could never really leave the true sense of family and home behind, and that God helps us down new paths.

Friends have continued to ask if I’m sad that our daughter chose a college far away from us, and I have to admit that I’m really not. Why? Because I’ve definitely learned through the years that only as we are unselfish are we truly happy. I know since God has made me naturally unselfish, I can “share” our daughter with the wider world by celebrating—not lamenting—the fact that she has gone away to school. After all, she isn’t truly mine; she’s always been God’s, and she’s going forth to shine even more brightly as her heavenly Father-Mother’s own self-expression.

This statement from Science and Health has been at the forefront of my thought lately: “Happiness is spiritual, born of Truth and Love. It is unselfish; therefore it cannot exist alone, but requires all mankind to share it” (p. 57). But you know, I hear those words with a slight twist now, saying reassuringly: “Your daughter is spiritual, born of Truth and Love. Let her go, unselfishly. She cannot exist alone for you, but requires mankind to get to know her and love her.” I’m so very grateful for how God meets our every need—through every transition.